If you were a dork like me and actually enjoyed the live action film of Super Mario Brothers, then you might appreciate this picture. Remember the movie's interpretation of 'Goombas'? Does this real life portrait of a dude not fit the bill???
And even if you don't know WHAT THE FUCK i'm talking about, does his head not seem a bit small for his body? Disproportioned bodies FTW!
While you're busy wasting your time on my blog, waste some more time at Sexy People. It's quite funny. Are these guys serious?
I'm driving down a street. I see a billboard. I look at the billboard (corporate america would have it no other way). This time I see a different kind of advertisement. The billboard says:
Now, what I found ironic about this billboard is the internet address provided for us to visit in order to confront god's ominous message: www.wakeupworld.com I did in fact visit this website and it's just a very poorly developed attempt to start yet another christian business. Speaking of which, sometimes I wish I was a christian because jesus titty fucking christ those guys make a lot of money off of a children's story. Nonetheless, I'm letting myself get distracted. The irony is the fact that the address tells us to wake up. WAKE UP WORLD! When in actuality, it is the followers of religion who need to wake the fuck up. I want to start a billboard campaign for atheists that says shit like "For God so loved the world, he gave your grandmother cancer and the middle east genocide. ~ John 3:fuckteen" When does it end? It does not surprise me though that a town of this size I now live in has a billboard like this. This crumbling, dilapidated town is made of a few dumbass, wannabe gangsters and christians. I can almost not differentiate between the two.
...of how ignorant some of the religious pushers in this world really are. Just another human being we can only hope natural selection will eventually remove from mankind.
I made time to visit the drive-in theater yesterday to watch two of the newest comedies out there. The first show was Pineapple Express.
I visited the drive-in with very high expectations for Pineapple. I admit to being a huge fan of Seth Rogan's and Judd Apatow's work. 40 Year Old Virgin, Knocked Up, Superbad...comedies just don't get much better than those nowadays. The same writing team from Superbad return with more of the same dry, repetitive, and sarcastic dialog; and I am glad they didn't try it any other way! The dialog in this set of films is superb. What astonishes me is why writing like this hasn't been attempted in the past. It feels like the easiest screenplay someone could write; however, I still believe only this team could mesh it together as brilliantly as they did in Pineapple Express.
It [Pineapple Express] has mounted itself easily into position on my top comedies list. It has widely been described as a 'stoner action flick', but don't let that mislead you. The so called action sequences are as boldly humorous as the high-as-a-kite conversations. One thing Seth and Evan (who co-wrote both Superbad and Pineapple) can do is keep an audience enthralled by conversation alone. They make it absurdly realistic and dry, and, of course, extremely funny. I honestly haven't laughed that hard at a modern comedy since, well, Superbad!
Honestly, folks, it doesn't get much better than this. Expect a lot of weed, a lot of dumb stoner dialog, and some minor action sprinkled throughout. The best comedy I have seen in a very long time. Go see it!
Now I must say something about the second half of my night out. Step Brothers. What can I say? Poor Will Ferrell? Is that adequate enough? Poor Will because he's finally getting old. I'm not referring to his age quite yet, but his redundancy rather. You can only do a certain amount of films in a certain amount of time before you realize there's no more steam left and it is time for a break.
Step Brothers wasn't completely awful. It has it's moments thanks in part to Ferrel's and John C. Reilly's expected behavior. It's more of the same. They act like low IQ idiots who consider everything you say to be the dumbest thing they had ever heard; and it's funny! But it does get old quick.
This is the first movie I've seen where I actually felt like the word FUCK was misused/overused. Don't misconstrue me now; I love the word FUCK. I feel it is a significant sentence enhancer when used correctly in comedy. Step Brothers though, man oh man, it felt like the word was forced out of the actors' mouths in places where it wasn't funny and felt completely unnecessary! I've never really experienced such a thing. It was a mind blowing. There was a moment where I got excited and thought the movie might have an entire turnaround. The brothers go to a job interview and guess who is conducting it: Seth Rogan from Pineapple! Here I am sitting and thinking, OMFG! There might be a chance he's in the rest of the movie and now it can only be better!! It turned out that the scene ended with a fart joke and we never see Seth again. There you have it. That is the state of Will Ferrell's current career. He's becoming monotonous and not picking his roles intelligently as of late and we're left wishing a younger, more clever version (Seth) will take over the show.
The writing was sub-par and disappointing. I felt like the last 30 minutes was written in the time it took to watch it. Everything and everyone met their resolutions in such a sharp, brief manner, that even for such a radical film, it was unbelievable and left a sour taste in my mouth. The film had some very funny moments, but they were just too short and sparse.
I love Will Ferrell. I loved his SNL skits, Anchorman, Talladega Nights, and he of course stole the show in Old School. He just needs to slow down and lay low for a little bit until we all miss him again and will yearn for more of his personality. Don't go waste your time with this movie. In fact, the funniest scene from the film WASN'T EVEN IN THE THEATRICAL RELEASE! So just watch the embedded clip below and consider yourself saved.
That is, sorry. Sorry I haven't been keeping this blog updated. It's just with moving, and birthdays, and job hunting, and figuring out the thing we call life, it's been rough. But stay tuned. I'll have some new shit posted now, so keep coming back. This is directed to all three of my avid visitors. =/
I predict....that no one from San Angelo will acknowledge my birthday just like everyone decided not to acknowledge my moving... more to come on that....
UPDATE I predict the only way anyone from San Angelo will wish me a happy birthday is through dumbass myspace. More to come....
